1. I most liked the poems on pages: 3, 5, 10, 15, 19, 20, 24, 30, 31, 38, 39, 42, 45, 48, 54, 58, 61, and 64. Out a 42 poems, I enjoyed 18 of them. I enjoyed three or four more so than the others, depending on my mood. This is a fine collection. Some of the poems I didn't enjoy had a line or phrase or three that I also liked.
2. The ones I didn't like as much often attempted to combine three or more ideas together, and ended up feeling muddled or too diverse—like the ideas didn't quite come together the way the poet wanted them too. Still, I think it's a fine instinct: they are fresh in their rejection of the typical poetry tactic of concise rumination on a single subject. But I think these most often fail because they attempt too much with too few words. A couple of combining phrases could've brought these ideas together like some for better poems did.
3. Her strongest poems often collide two ideas or events that seem initially unrelated, but from whose simultaneity are drawn conclusions that do relate well. Like in "Notes on a 39-year-old-body," which pulls together a description of aging ovaries and the progression towards becoming a lady. From their collision she draws out a conclusion that coming to terms with aging, folly, and social roles is not necessarily a betrayal of self, but can be a dangerous or freeing erasure of sensation. And in sparse, found language, I think it works.
4. Her sounds are often wonderful, with a rolling, irregular rhyme scheme that lets almost no vowel be forgotten without a partner or two. These various internal rhymes and half rhymes punctuate her irregular forms to provide legibility, pacing, and a fulfillment of the other partners. For instance, in "Annunciation (from the grass beneath them)", five lines in the middle really stuck out to me:
even the shadows her chin madeHer poetry often relies on these rhymes—two or three quick repetitions of vowel sound interwoven with the end of the last set of rhymes and the beginning of the next. It works for me.
never touched but reached just passed
the crushed mint, the clover clustered between us
how cool would you say it was
still cool from the clouds
5. The book relies upon Biblical metaphors and imagery, but not in an overpowering way. In "An Update on Mary," I get the sense that she and these poems exist without a theological purpose, but use theology and Biblical stories as a reference point on which life is reflected, to which life is compared, by which life is cyclical. Biblical imagery is the right way to say it, I think. It's decidedly not proselytizing, but uses the Bible as myth to inform and exemplify life.
6. I think the theme is a coming to terms, a search for understanding and a way to exist individually within the complex mythologies, ceremonies, and spiritualities of life. When she views the repetition of pigeons in "To Many Pigeons to Count and One Dove," their similarity obscures their individuality and actions initially, but she bores of that observation and finds her mind turning to the one dove and her own lover. In "Yet not Consumed, the burning bush encourages her "to turn what I am / into I am," or, to find her true self outside of the relations, interests, jobs that we allowed to define ourselves. She senses self in spirituality. It's really quite interesting, this theme meditated upon Biblical imagery.
7. Some poems rely too much on the poet is a character. Not because this is inherently a bad tactic—Brother Ali and Louise Gluck do this quite well—but because not enough is understood about the poet to allow these hinted at judgments of hers to be legible. To use the most extreme example in the book, she isn't a breeder, but reflects a couple of times on a woman throwing her children off of a bridge. What I am supposed to draw from this contrast? She seems emphatically a non-breeder, but to the point of identifying with this woman? Does she desire the "angel of abortion"? Probably not, as I can't quite imagine this empathetic persona of hers approving these children dying. But my point it it isn't entirely clear, the question lingers, and I get the sense that either I'm reading with a mind too open, or she didn't resolve this thread, among others. These lingering doubts make me feel that the inclusion of herself as a character wasn't as well planned, thought out, or executed as the Biblical imagery was. It feels like she uses herself simply because others are doing it and it's cool right now, not because it's adding anything to her work specifically.
8. That said, much of her is explained—especially in the fantastic "Update on Mary": "When people say 'Mary,' Mary still thinks Holy Virgin! Holy Heavenly Mother! But Mary knows she is not any of those things." The explanation of these characteristics is strong, but they seem to lack relation to some of the failed attempts at using the poet as character.
9. Her lists are strong. The list of the angels in "Invitation" is surprisingly unusual: abortion, prostitution, earthquakes, et cetera. But also in "To Many Pigeons to Count and One Dove," where the list catalogs activities of the pigeons through the chronological observation and realizations of the poet.
10. Some poems are idea poems. I'm not quite sure what I mean, or how to say it. Some poems show a succession of ideas placed consecutively not necessarily following logical paths. "Update on Mary" is a great example: it's simply a prose listing of actions, thoughts, and characteristics of Mary that creates an idea of her through compiling a number of revealing ideas and anecdotes. "Entrances and Exits" relies upon description of various entrances and exits to convey a sense of the fragility of life and how mystery is inextricably tied up in it—it's a strong idea and the poem conveys it, but it wasn't one that I enjoyed because the language was a little too fractured for my tastes. It's almost that these idea poems are thought experiments, poetic progressions of ideas, attempts at communicating revelation. They're like a mood piece or a theme poem, but based around different interactions with an idea. They're compilations of ideas, but not quite list poems—more like the compilation of themes and ideas in Bradbury's The Martian Chronicles. It's an interesting idea, but I think it needs to be sharply focused and the parts related better to each other in order to work more often in such small spaces. In a larger space I think it could've worked more easily.
11. Her work feels less reliant upon concise form and wording, and more on a holistic compilation of seemingly disperate parts. This feels fresh but also doesn't always work. Sometimes it's tied together nicely, sometimes one part fails to interest or be legible, and sometimes it just feels meandering, confused, and long winded. But the contrasts are strong—through poems like the short, concise, and sparse "Notes on a 39 year old body", the longer works have a foil that does not fail to impart importance and reflection. This variety is well done and well paced within the collection. It shows a breadth of skill in the poet to be able to switch between longer and shorter works so effortlessly
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